You don't need to identify with what happened to you

We live in a time where a lot of us share our stories with the world. Whether it is through social media or in blogs or through our life’s work we share what happened to us and the lessons we learned. It’s all very Joseph Campbells The hero’s journey-like and I love it. But to a certain point.

We’ve all been through trauma. Big or small. We’ve all had tough patches in our lives, whether self-inflicted or by someone else. We love to analyze it. But at a certain point it doesn’t really matter where you got it. It’s yours now. And you can decide whether you want to identify with it or not.

First, I identified as the sick person. Then I started identifying with the one who overcame. Now I’m tired of identification all together. I’ve healed, I’ve overcome, and I screw up all the time. I stumble and I fall and I get hurt. Neither is my identity. I’m new every moment if I choose to.

Who do you want to be today? How can you consolidate and learn from what you’ve been through and let yourself be whoever you feel like being, today?

With all my love,

Helena

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There's so much to strive for and I'm already there

I started this business with the mission of helping 1 million people reach more of their potential. The number in itself doesn’t mean much to me, because I can’t feel 1 million people, I can only feel one at a time. And I feel one at a time many times a week nowadays.

All the emails, DM’s and comments I still get from being a guest on the Swedish podcast Food Pharmacy (episode 57) the other week: “The interview was so inspiring that I dare to hope again, and I know that I can make a difference in my own life too”. The feedback I got after this talk I did the other day about finding balance in a hectic life: “Thank you for giving me simple tools to increase my everyday life quality”. The coaching clients I see every week that in different ways prove that the work we do together have a great impact on their lives.

This is not about me. It’s about all of them. And looking at each person individually, I see their potential and how they’re showing up for their life more fully. I’m so grateful that I get to be there to witness it happening.

Stil, I’m far from 1 million people. And that’s okay. I will keep going. Everyday in different ways. Stepping into more and more of my potential I know that that act alone is what helps others do the same. There’s so much more I want to do. And I’m already there. Or it’s already here.

What dreams are you still striving for? What have you already accomplished? How can both exist at the same time? Celebrate your accomplishments and dreams fulfilled on your road to more.

With all my love,

Helena

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A love letter to my body

It’s not always easy to love our body. Most things around us tells us not to.

I’ve had my fair share of ups and down in my relationship to it, and still do. But we grow together nowadays. I know it serves me the best it can. I know now that my body is the only vehicle I have in this world to express myself and experience this life. Deep down I do love my body. We’ve been through a lot together. And, as with all relationships, we still have bad days, and that’s okay. I wrote this love letter to my body.

Dear body,

I love you. I really do.

Thank you for always serving me. Thank you for carrying me through the world. Thank you for always striving to get me back to balance no matter what.

I’m sorry for all the times I’m not listening to you. Forgive me for all the times I’ve treated you like shit. I’m sorry that I sometimes judge you by your looks although I know you are so much more.

I promise I will be loyal to you, as you are to me. I promise I will listen to you and fulfill your needs, as you listen to all my dreams and hopes and do your best to let me experience this life to the fullest. And when I don’t succeed, when I speed to fast, when I fuel you with toxins or don’t give you time to rest, please forgive me.

I love you.

With all my love,

Helena

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My book baby is out!

Someone said that when a book is delivered to the world, it’s no longer in your hands, therefor you can’t compare it to a baby. Because a baby you gotta take care of for a long, long time. My book don’t need me anymore. It’s ready to fly on its own, and therefor I will let it fly.

Someone else said that if you don’t like sales in particular you can focus on sharing instead. So here I am, sharing with you, that my book is now available for pre-order on my website. You can also download the Opening of the book in either Swedish or English when you sign up for my newsletter.

That’s what I’m sharing with you today.

I would be lying saying I’m not super excited about getting to witness the difference this book can make in people’s lives. If you know of anyone who would benefit of a little hope on their journey, make sure to share it with them too.

Happy. Thank you. More, please!

With all my love,

Helena

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Life as a writer

Hours and hours of editing. Solving technical issues and creative challenges. Look. Feel. Editing again. Focus time and losing it. Blurry eyes from staring at the written word for hours on end. Procrastination. Giving up and getting at it again. Losing hope and finding inspiration. Creating space and disappearing in other busyness. This journey has not been all shiny roses.

And yet.

Pouring your heart into the page and realizing it lands. Creating something from nothing. Cups of tea in front of the fireplace. Writing in nature, in the sofa, by the desk, in hotel lobbies and on the train. Letting your book baby create her own identity in the world. Knowing that it will make a difference. Watching it make a difference, for someone, somewhere.

It’s like all of life. Paradoxical. Both and much, much more.

I’m so proud of myself for keeping myself accountable and for getting it out into the world. Yesterday I hit publish on my book in Swedish. It’ll be available on Amazon soon and on my website in a few weeks. I’ll be sure to let you know about its unfolding.

But for now, letting it rest. Letting me rest. Hope you let yourself do the same if you need it.

With all my love,

Helena

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When you're bored, do this!

One of my favorite pastimes when I'm bored is to make lists in my head of all the things I'm grateful for. When in line, in a traffic jam, waiting for a friend. Once you get warmed up, you will probably be so fully filled with appreciation for all the awesomeness in your life that you'll be able to take a dip in the awesome gratitude jacuzzi. 

Is there any better way to pass the time? 

Watch where your mind wanders and you might realize why your life is the way it is. Make conscious decisions about where you direct it and you'll create more of the things you're really grateful for. Give it a try! 

With all my love,
Helena

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Why I wrote the book

I first got sick when I was 12. Got my first diagnosis at 13. And I thought: I feel really lonely in this. If I ever get out on the other side I’ll write a book about it to help others.

It took many years for the book to be written and it’s not specifically written for teenagers but it’s still the book I was supposed to write. Working through the book again for the translation is making me fall in love with it all over again.

I think one of the reasons why it took me so long to get this book finished was that it was supposed to be a broader book than it originally would have been. This is not a book for only sick people. It’s not for the broken. It’s a book that embraces the wholeness of everyone. It’s a book about hope. A book about life. A book about holistic healing.

I really hope that you’ll like it.

With all my love,

Helena

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Both and more

I heard someone say about pain and fear, that they say hello in a very overwhelming way. They don’t just sneak up on us or tap us on the shoulder. When pain or fear comes to visit they almost drown us out completely. At least temporarily.

That’s okay. You’re okay even if you’re in pain or fear.

But what if there’s more there? What if other things could co-exist with pain or fear? What if there could also be beauty? Or comfort? Or lots of love in the midst of misery?

I recently did a training about healing. I am currently finishing the translation of my book. I do regular blood tests and one of them came out slightly out of the normal and needs to be checked again.

Welcome fear. Welcome pain. You’re here again. That’s okay. We know each other well although we’ve drifted apart in recent years. But I still love you, although I don’t particularly like either of you.

I try to practice what I preach. Being with it. Letting more in. Asking what it wants me to know. And knowing that in this present moment, only love exists. I’m not in a life threatening situation. I am safe. In front of my computer. Writing words of comfort.

With all my love,

Helena

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So, I wrote this book...

I wrote this book last year called: Pure Personal Power - tools to collect on a healing journey. I’m really proud about it but I realize I haven’t talked much about it in a while.

It’s the story of my journey of healing and it has 32 tools and countless tips on how you can take the power back of your life and health. I wrote it in English to be inclusive but soon realized that some Swedes felt excluded because they were not comfortable reading in English and so I translated it. The Swedish version will be out very soon and the English version is of course still available.

The translation has been a long time coming but I’m for sure approaching the finish line. I truly hope that it will reach a lot of people because I wrote what I myself needed to read a few years back. Taking back the power over your life is not always easy, but with guidance and inspiration it definitely doable.

This is me about a year ago, getting the first proof copy of the printed book.

This is me about a year ago, getting the first proof copy of the printed book.

My book, reaching readers in 9 different countries!

My book, reaching readers in 9 different countries!

A surreal feeling; signing my own book at my book release.

A surreal feeling; signing my own book at my book release.

Required book club reading :)

Required book club reading :)

This is a crazy person promoting her book.

This is a crazy person promoting her book.

Dream come true talk about the book.

Dream come true talk about the book.

Soon, very soon, you’ll be able to order the book in both Swedish and English online. If you haven’t read it yet, I highly recommend you stay tuned for updates to come!

Check out the English version here or here.

With all my love,

Helena

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Don't go looking for pain

I try to live my life according to the principle of pleasure. It’s difficult because my mind, just as most of ours, has something called the negativity bias. This means it looks for problems and threats, just because that used to be the reason humans would survive in the wild.

We don’t live in the wild anymore and most threats are made up in our minds, although our mind is not smart enough to realize when the threat is made up and when there’s an actual tiger in front of us. So we need to practice. Looking for pleasure instead of looking for pain.

No matter how many problems you have and what you’re struggling with right now, you are not obliged to constantly think about your pain points. It’s not responsible. Responsible is setting aside time for taking appropriate action towards solving your problem, feeling your feelings around the issue, asking for help, but just as much letting it go, staying with the present, giving it space and taking pleasure in life.

You know when you wake up in the morning and you actually feel fine but your mind goes on a hunt for the problem at hand. As if it’s the job of the mind to never lose track of it. Catch it before it finds it. Take charge by filling your mind with the beauty in your life, the moments of bliss, all the things you have to be grateful for. Pain will unfortunately find you, you don’t have to go looking for it.

With all my love,

Helena

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Accept judgement and criticism

Most people don’t really enjoy judgement or criticism. A lot of us are people pleasers that only want others to like us. Which, we also know, is practically impossible. But still we try, to fix, to adjust, to please. All because we don’t want the judgement or criticism.

But what if we could just accept that judgement and criticism is part of life? That it will happen to us whether we fight our whole lives to avoid it or we simply live our lives regardless of what other people might think?

It’s usually the resistance to whatever scares us that ends up hurting us more. Because what we resists persists. Which means, acceptance gives us freedom. Acceptance increases the possibility of the icky feeling moving through faster, and not lingering too long. Also, if we could accept judgement and criticism as part of life endless possibilities open up, we can do whatever we want!

Also, what other people think of you is none of your business, it’s their business. And it usually tells you a lot more about them, and how they’re suffering, than it tells you anything new about you.

Don’t be afraid of people not liking you. Some people just don’t. And they won’t. That’s okay. Focus on the ones that do love you, they deserve all of your attention.

With all of my love,

Helena

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What does support look like right now?

I heard one of my favorite mentors, Brene Brown, suggest this question on Marie Forleos podcast the other day.

People (read: me and you) are generally not very good at asking for help. In especially difficult times in our lives it’s also pressure added to come up with, ask for and delegate what we need help with to others. This question is so good to ask because it: 1) states that we are willing to give support 2) we take away the burden of saying yes to help.

Whenever this question is posed it gives an opportunity for the person being asked to go inward and check what is needed right now. It could be whatever; a hug, some space, help with buying food, permission to went, togetherness in silence, some advice, a lift somewhere…

Try it. Next time someone in your life is going through something hard, try simply asking: What does support look like right now? and for the extra ballsy, try asking yourself the same when you’re low. How could you support yourself in this instance?

With all my love,

Helena

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